Have Games, Will Travel

The beginnings of the American Revolution, simplified
BRITISH EMPIRE: All right, fine, your stupid embargo worked. We won’t levy any more taxes-
AMERICAN COLONIES: Huzzah! Time to get drunk!
BRITISH EMPIRE: Except on tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: What?
BRITISH EMPIRE: Get over it, it’s just tea. Seriously, where do you get this idea that you’re special and should never have to pay taxes? We hope that idea doesn’t go on to infect your political discourse centuries from now.
AMERICAN COLONIES: We’re not buying your stupid tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Are you being serious right now? What are you going to do, just stop drinking tea?
AMERICAN COLONIES: Yes. We’ll drink coffee.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do you even know what that is?
AMERICAN COLONIES: No, but we’ve heard it’s good and we’re feeling surly.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Fine, whatever, we don’t even care what you do anymore.
BRITISH EAST INDIA COMPANY: Actually, we are pretty much bankrupt, so you need to make them drink the tea.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Oh, for—just drink the tea.
AMERICAN COLONIES: No.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Do it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: NO.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it.
AMERICAN COLONIES: Fuck you.
BRITISH EMPIRE: Drink it or we’ll punch you in the face.
AMERICAN COLONIES: *Boston Tea Party*
BRITISH EMPIRE: What the hell?
AMERICAN COLONIES: We heard it was Indians.
BRITISH EMPIRE: That’s interesting, because we heard it was a bunch of colonists wearing paint and dressed in costumes that were remarkably similar to what a crowd of drunks who wanted to look like Indians would assemble if the only supplies they had were found in an alley behind a bar.
AMERICAN COLONIES: You get all types in Boston.
BRITISH EMPIRE: …*Coercive Acts*
AMERICAN COLONIES: Oh, it is ON.
  1. icarryyour-heart-withme reblogged this from rebelagainstnormality
  2. the-cuddliest-wombat reblogged this from rebelagainstnormality
  3. rebelagainstnormality reblogged this from the--bad-guy
  4. the--bad-guy reblogged this from little-black-lab
  5. little-black-lab reblogged this from thatblondeeveryonelaughsat
  6. ashynarr reblogged this from heroicalfred
  7. ohprimusthatlookspainful reblogged this from spicypeppers
  8. moeparker reblogged this from maidofpasta
  9. shinobijosh reblogged this from ylimme
  10. ylimme reblogged this from students-ragequit
  11. youremydivision reblogged this from kirameku-mars
  12. kirameku-mars reblogged this from youremydivision
  13. selfihateyouithink reblogged this from quickpixie
  14. humorousharlequin reblogged this from licoriceandribbons
  15. southern-humidity reblogged this from fuckyeahamurica and added:
    televisions, kids.)
  16. xo--baby--xo reblogged this from autumnazure
  17. thetomwhoisbig reblogged this from autumnazure
  18. autumnazure reblogged this from ni69afucky0blog
  19. not-that-kind-of-doctor reblogged this from cooper-jones
  20. londonspleen reblogged this from allons-yfredweasley
  21. pr4yfor-plagues reblogged this from my-road-ends-here
  22. raccoonofjustice reblogged this from obliviateyourfears
  23. obliviateyourfears reblogged this from lenbewashere
  24. lenbewashere reblogged this from acidicfishes
  25. acidicfishes reblogged this from sunriseinvalhalla
  26. sunriseinvalhalla reblogged this from pure-masochistic-dere-dere
  27. tell-me-something-true reblogged this from undertheelectricsky
  28. wonderpuff reblogged this from thebrownwizard
  29. bestfriendplease reblogged this from heydonotbringmedown
  30. atlasnerd reblogged this from hailsnowrain
  31. sivouspreferez reblogged this from fmlfoodmusiclife
  32. fmlfoodmusiclife reblogged this from haileyaa92
  33. discordant-musings reblogged this from samrgarrett
  34. somethingsomethingclever reblogged this from allthejawlines